Don't Say Don't!

I read an interesting article today...

When I tell my children I don't want them to do something, the opposite usually occurs. For instance, I might say "Don't throw food at the table!" or "Don't think about the color purple." But guess what happens in your brain.... you immediately think of yourself throwing food at the table, or you see the color purple in your mind!

I learned that the brain cannot envision negative-type words, such as "don't," but it does see pictures or images.

The article suggested that it is more effective to say "Please use walkways," rather than "Don't walk on the grass." I believe this is true, because whenever I have seen a sign warning me to not walk on the grass, I find myself extremely tempted to do just that!

A teacher who admonishes her students not to cheat is actually causing them to envision doing just that. In their minds, they see themselves looking at their neighbor's papers.

It is far better to send the brain a positive image, describing the action we would like to see performed, rather than the negative text, which brings to mind the action we are trying to get them to avoid. When I can say exactly what I desire, chances are greater that my children will do what was suggested.

And that means a happier mom, happier kids, and a happier home!